Looking For Me?

That's right. I've moved to a new place. So please update your browsers and travel with me! Don't worry, though, Smut Girl will stay up in its entirety as a static site. Below are so many goodies~ a full listing of anthologies I'm in, places I hang, tons of quotes, a bevy of bright covers and I refuse to let it all go. That would be like throwing away a shoe collection. *gasp*

So if you're new to me, you have years and year and years of naughtiness to poke around in. Just dive in head first and when you're through come check me out on Sommer Marsden. If you're a constant reader, I'll be at the new place almost every day. Hope you are too!

XOXO
Sommer
p.s. click my image to get escorted to the new place ;)~

Mmm...en and lingerie

Love it.

That being said, you have no idea how hard it was to officiate Alison Tyler's Dear...Dear...Dear letter leg of the Smut Marathon. Truly. I had two that were neck and neck but the laugh out loud quality of the winner "Customer Service" got me in the end. (heh) And it wasn't just me. After I sent in my choice, the voters tagged it their fave too.

Way to go t'sade! You rock. You roll. You had me at 'teddy'.

Stay tuned for more of Ms. Tyler's sensational smut as the marathon continues.

XOXO
Sommer

one stuff, two stuff...

red stuff...um....blue stuff? Whatever. I am here to tell you stuff!

Stuff #1: to your right you will see a stellar cover for Logical Lust's upcoming Spank! edited by D.L. King. That's right...I'm in it. My story Sugar appears betwixt that lovely cover.

Right now there is a pre-release giveaway going on at Goodreads. Go use your clicker finger to enter to win. And then you can use your clicker finger to...well, nevermind. You'll figure it out.

Stuff #2: Torn has gotten an awesome (with awesome sauce) review at Goodreads and I got a mention. I am a favorite. I am so, so pleased. Mostly because I worried my story wouldn't fly. Yes. I always worry my story won't fly. I'm totally waiting for that to pass as I click off the years as a pro writer. I'm still waiting. And waiting...

Thanks to our reviewer and if you haven't slipped into Torn yet. Um...what are you waiting for?

That's all the stuff for now!

XOXO
Sommer

you call it quickie sex...

I call it good Karma.

I had just sent an email to a friend telling her a hard to find item (for her) was easily available everywhere 'round here and I would totally buy it and send it out. No. Big. Deal. I had just done this when I heard a sleepy but eager voice say in passing, "I've got a quickie in me if you're interested..." as he sauntered past to go to bed.

I only hurried a little bit (thusly nearly setting the hallway carpet on fire with my swiftly paddling bare feet) up to our bedroom. One good turn deserves an orgasm...or three.

Karma isn't a bitch. She's a matchmaker. ;)~

Now I'll go watch TV and read--pleasantly relaxed and more than a little bit 'blushy'.

XOXO

Sommer

you got your voyeurism in my exhibitionism...

you got your exhibitionism in my voyeurism. Two great fetishes that go great together. My latest short Primping is out now. Spotted at places like ARe and Bookstrand and coming soon to a Kindle near you.

On the home front, I am waiting for my mother to pick up girl child so I can run out. She's (my mom) got her (girl child) working for her this summer on her new bidness project. My mother is always late. Always. But if you tell her that she blames my dad. Even if he's not...um...with her. Heh.

Off I go to find something to do while we wait. And wait...

XOXO
Sommer

random things i insist you see...

My beautiful, brand new, clean and did I mention clean as it will ever be oven? And you can see my "Christmas Kitchen" mid renovation. Please pardon our mess and undoneness. Barn red on the bottom, olive green above. We're thinking some cream/creme/yellowish/antique-ish color for the chair rail...we'll see.

My recently attained "good ass jeans". And I'd like to thank Gloria Vanderbilt for (theoretically) designing them for me and the local J.C. Penney's for putting them on the ridiculous clearance price of 80% off. My only complaint is I was dumb ass stupid enough to not buy two pair while I was standing there with the whole wrack of nearly-free-jeans.

The sweeeeeeet books the equally gorgeous UPS man just delivered to me. One US version (not out yet) and one UK version (out). The Mammoth Book of Threesomes and Moresomes sure is a gorgeous book (cover is different on Amazon US). This is my first time working with Linda Alvarez. My third? fourth? appearance in a Mammoth collection. This one contains my story Gift Exchange. Purdy ;)

You are now free to leave. Hurry! Run! Before I think of something else to show you.

XOXO
Sommer

head full of...

...boys kissing. I am juggling a few projects at once, but the one gobbling up most of my time is giving me sexy flashes like above. Mmm. Sexy, sweet boys kissing.

I'm also doing a mainstream dark crime-ish novel...and of course that meant that I turned around and got an idea for a full length paranormal starring not just a werewolf but a vamp, too. Fully formed. Ready to go. Hatched from my dirty girl writer brain completely ready to hit the ground running.

Urph. That sound you hear is my brain exploding. But I'm not complaining, better I scramble to keep up with them than have to go hunt for them with a stick and a flashlight. Ideas, I mean...not werewolves and vamps.

And on the kitchen front...we have an oven! Tada! It's been ten months. The first thing I did: made my homemade biscotti. First time making them gluten free and might I say, Yippeee! Finally, a dessert that improves using GF flour. They were flaky and dry and crisp the way any respectable biscotti should be. I love my oven. I kissed it. Once. Okay, ten times. Shut up.

XOXO
Sommer

And the winner of the 13 Giveaway is...

Andrea! Yay and thanks to all who emailed me (a shy bunch). I'll do future giveaways so please come back and see me!

Andrea chose Calendar Girl so tada! off it went through the ether to her. Here's hoping she likes it. *fingers crossed*.

Back out the door. I've been in and out and up and down and over all day. I'm feeling like a human ping-pong ball. Am looking forward to plopping in the ugly pink chair later to write.

XOXO
Sommer

giveaway (((Giveaway, GIVEAWAY)))

13 is my lucky number! Woop! In honor of today, I figured I'd do a giveaway (in my best monster truck rally voice (see above)). Send me a note addressed to [hot4sommer at yahoo dot com] titled 13 Giveaway (for you shy ones). Or you can just comment here on my blog and make sure to leave your email addy for me to contact you.

Winner will get choice of any ebook I have to give. So peruse my side bar (oh, baby) and see what you fancy.

I'll run it until Monday because we are buying a stove this weekend. We haven't had one in Six. Months. No...eight months! (have I mentioned I tend to procrastinate? And am poor?) So, stove shopping, out to dinner, and writing. That is my weekend.

If you are in the market for some fabulous sexy letter fiction, the latest leg of Alison Tyler's Smut Marathon is up. I am the judge this week. I have no idea how I'm going to choose. No. Idea! But you can go vote for your favorite here.

XOXO

Sommer

look at all those ravens...

4.5 of them to be exact for Smoking Hot! Thanks to Ashley at The Black Raven's Reviews for taking the time to review me. And for all those ravens! ;)

XOXO
Sommer

Let's get fired up...let's get fired up...oh,baby

I was never a cheerleader, that wasn't my thing, and I rarely get fired up. But I did yesterday. And instead of letting it consume me alive, I shared my two cents. Out loud. With words. And then didn't worry over it. It's my guest blot today at Excessica. So you tell me what you think. I've said my peace...oops, piece, and now I want to listen.

XOXO

Sommer

under the weather...

so i might be silent for a few. but look whose birthday is today! tada. a big five year old boy. :)

xoxo
s

Neato-Benito

Whatever that means. I just like saying it :D. Smoking Hot got more stars today! 4.5 to be exact from Jen at Night Owl Reviews. Awesomeness. Now I'm going to go "write" and by write I mean sit on the sofa with my laptop and stare at it until I give up. I am soooooo tired. Beach and then they dragged me home, made me shower and made me take them school shopping (o_O). I am now very tired. And very poor.

XOXO

Sommer

maybe i've just had sex in a ton of weird places...

Happily Ever After Reviews gave Smoking Hot a nice review last week. The premise of the book is a hot blind date and a truly haunted house. As in the main characters are being aggressively pursued by a dead soul. So when the reviewer said this:

[The sex scenes are seriously hot and will leave your pulse rising. Ms. Marsden captured the extra intensity that fear adds to the most pleasurable of experiences. ]The only awkwardness that I found was in the locations the characters chose to have sex while being pursued...

I had to smile. There are only so many places you can have sex in the middle of a rocking Halloween party whilst being pursued by a spirit. Or so I think. Maybe I've just had sex in a ton of weird places!

Thanks to HEAR for taking the time to review and for the kind words. The whole thing can be found here.


Off to the beach today. The summer...she is slipping away from us.

XOXO
Sommer

I love middle of the night sex...

and I'm clutching the 90 oz mug of coffee to prove it. Oh god. Am old woman. Have been up since 3.30 after only 3 hours of sleep. Don't get me wrong, it was totally, totally, totally worth it. I just usually go back to sleep. (o_O)

This is going to be a loooooooooooooong day and I'm already plotting a nap.

XOXO
Sommer

p.s. that is not my mug but I am currently coveting it. Big time.

oh, there you are!

new reading/computer glasses. Oh look! I can actually see stuff!

Got a good, good yay-wahoo-woop!-yes on my book Learning To Drown today (out w/Excessica at some future date) and the other day got a yes for a new short paranormal with Ellora's Cave. And now...I can actually read my contracts. Tada!

XOXO

Sommer

p.s. I know you can't see it, but these are cobalt blue with baby blue accents and scribblies inside. Love them. Thought I'd get red, wondered about blue, then tried on red, blue, green and purple (after three years of tortoise shell) and walked out with blue. Hunh. I was really thinking I'd end up with red. Go figure ;)

look what came last night!

No, not me. Okay, okay, no comment. We'll go with that. But this was on my doorstep when the man went out front to take down the flag for storms. Yay! Lesbian Lust is pretty fucking hot. And bonus, I kick off the book. Or my story "The Girl With The Bettie Page Bangs" does. :)

Grab yours today! Your copy, I mean.

XOXO
Sommer

veg porn

So if anyone ever told me I'd take nearly pornographic pictures of vegetables (yes, yes, tomatoes are tehcnically a fruit, hold your emails!) because I thought they looked so gorgeous and lucious and ripe I would have laughed. In their face. Hard! But um...yeah. See--->

Biggest tomato I'd ever seen. One slice covered my whole piece of GF bread for my BLT last night. And as good as it was pretty (and hefty!). It was almost a shame to eat it. Almost.

We are off to the pool today. Enjoy the veg porn. Hope your day is full of lovely fresh things.

XOXO
Sommer

And the winner...

of Lucky 13 is Nicole Zoltack #7976 . Yay and wahoo! Thanks to all who visited for the 1RE Anniversary Blog Tour. I hope you'll pop in and see me some more. ;)

XOXO

Sommer

playing hookie...

today. Good thing I had a big cup of coffee to start my day. Thanks to the talented and clever Willsin Rowe for this very sweet cuppa. Off we go. I'll return tonight to announce the 1RE anniversary winner.


XOXO
Sommer

"Boy, howdy!" as my grandfather would say...

There they are in their golden glory: half done, the other half frying, and then blissfully ready to eat. The walk to the farmer's stand paid off. Fried green tomatoes. Haven't had them in years and now...stuffed full of 'em. Happy Sunday.

XOXO
Sommer

always a writer to watch...

hey, look at me. Getting not one but two mentions in ERWA this month. I admit it, I got all girly and felt a little weepy when I read them back to back.

Re: my story "Still Life" in BWE 2010 Jean Roberta has this to say:

"Still Life" by Sommer Marsden (always a writer to watch) involves a woman's epiphany about her troubled relationship with herself. The man in her life is willing to go far out of his way to give her what she claims to want—but that is not enough. The visual image of the female narrator, a model, posing motionless in a roomful of plastic mannequins where her man has brought the "real" girl he just picked up is one of the most memorable in this anthology. This story raises questions about the differences between reality and media-driven fantasy that will resonate with any woman who has ever felt pressured to look and behave in certain ways.

And Re: my story "Thrift Store Whore" in Please, Ma'am Ashley Lister has this to say:

Take, for instance, Sommer Marsden’s ‘Thrift Store Whore.’ Sommer Marsden is an accomplished short story teller and ‘Thrift Store Whore’ is replete with her trademark combination of quality fiction set sizzling by detailed, delightful sex. The central conflict in this story is the narrator’s need to be obedient to his partner, even when his partner makes demands that go beyond being reasonable.

So big, huge, tearful thanks to them and you can read all this month's reviews here.

xoxo
Sommer

did you get your FREE copy?

An awesome, made me smile review/rating of my free short Light Flirting. It's for free on Smashwords, 1RE, Barnes and Noble and a few other places. So if you haven't grabbed one, do so and see if you agree with this genius man. I mean very nice man. I'm not implying that he's a genius just because he liked my work. That would be laughable. I would never ever ever say something like that and...I'm not fooling anyone am I? Oh well. Free!

XOXO
Sommer

in memory of my favorite, now-deceased jeans...

I wrote "More Holes Than Jeans" for this new collection from PTP. Put on your favorite abused pair and come check us out...

XOXO

Sommer

just when you thought reading reviews wasn't safe...

Tada! I am so excited by this review I have no words. You heard me! No. Words! And that is rare. (Okay, so I typed a few words. Be quiet.)

XOXO

Sommer

p.s. you can buy your very own neon flamingo here. I want one!

13 things...

I'm guest blogging at Excessica today and confessing 13 things I wish I'd written. Come confess yours to me...if you dare (Muwah-ha-ha!). Okay, so it's not a scary blog, but that was fun ;)

XOXO

Sommer

new stuff...

Available on all the usual places including Kindle, All Romance Ebooks and Bookstrand. Today has been a revolving door day, so I'm just getting to blog. Girl child had a bike accident yesterday. She fought a parked car. She lost. And so did her glasses (o_O) But she's pretty decent considering, thx to those of you who were asking on Twitter :)

XOXO
Sommer

I've yet to read Jodi Picoult...

but I grabbed one of her novels the other day when I dropped girl child off for her volunteer job. Then she pops up in the magazine I'm reading. Given a recent so-so review or two and one unfortunate 'starring' incident, I totally loved what she had to say about reviews in general. Though I've yet to have a super negative or nasty review (knock wood) it always helps to have perspective and a word or two from other writers. Thought some of my fellow writers might want to peek:


Do you read the reviews of your books?

Every year I say I won't and every year I do. Some reviewers are really good at giving honest, balanced reviews. Some reviewers are just angry they're not writing book too. The New York Times just seems to hate me on a general principle because I choose to write commercial fiction.

oooooh, i heard this song...

after my chauffeur/mom morning duties of running kids about. I had not heard or thought of this song for a thousand years. So, I cranked it up and belted it out. God damn I love the Eagles! (or if you are from Balmer "The Iggles"). Anyhoo the whatchamcallit (whammy bar?) is sexy and the song got in my head and gave me some ideas and then bam! I remembered you have today and tomorrow to vote in the current leg (heh) of the Smut Marathon. The theme? Stilettos. Talk about woo-woo spooky. ;)

I tried and tried to find the actual Iggles singing but no luck. So sorry. You have to settle for hot girls in shoes.

XOXO
Sommer

Side Effects May Include...

So, if you are a constant reader you know (scroll down, friend) that things around here have been a wee bit topsy turvy of late. There's been some fear, growing pains, angst, worry, anxiety, etc. A lot of you want to know about the BSP, too.

Here's the deal: BSP guy and I did not see eye to eye in the long run. So...BSP is still in the works but now BSP stands for Beloved Steady Project. Because I am finishing that fucker and it will go all the way to the finish line no worries. And right on the tail of me and BSP guy going our separate ways came USP! Unexpected Surprise Project! With a dotted line and everything. I guess the whole everything happens for a reason and my life knows what it's doing even if I don't mentality is pretty on the money sometimes.

Now on to the side effects. I noticed something today when I went to do something I've done for the last (roughly) seven years. I went to drop my kids off at the yearly summer VBS and I was around a lot of people who have always made me feel judged and uncomfortable. Let me rephrase that, actually, I always felt judged thusly letting myself feel uncomfortable. Today when I waltzed in there with my super fantastic how did I luck out and get such cool kids, I not only felt comfy around my mother-in-law and sister-in-law (whose church it is) but I felt comfortable. Period. I dealt with people who have always made me feel scrutinized and less than and criticized and I was smiling and laughing and just as comfortable in my own skin as I was in those beloved (now deceased) perfect jeans of mine that I murdered through overuse a few years ago. I was fine. I was secure, I was good, I was content, I was damn near fucking glowing!

So maybe that has been the point of the last hellacious, painful, roller coaster, falling through project, losing friends, man has illness last eight months. Maybe the side effect of weathering all the stress and upheaval and being forced to find things to be grateful for in the middle of shit storms was...comfort. In me. In my own skin. Walking into a place and in my own self feeling this way: Here I am, fuckers! Love me or feel free to kiss my ass. Because me? I am so totally good inside, you wouldn't believe me if I told you...

And it's true.

XOXO
Sommer
p.s. apparently this new found self assurance is visible to those paying attention. I have to say I've felt this way for about a week and I have never had more doors held for me by chivalrous men (from nine to ninety-nine!) in my life.
p.p.s. upon BSP falling through the boy child said to me "Hey, you know you liked the Cage the Elephant song? Well they have a new one and you need to listen to it mom. You NEED to. So I thought why does that ring a bell? Hunh. This is why. So great minds think alike b/c this is my new theme song! And do I have the wisest kid or what?

If I were a hotel, I'd hang this over my door...

That 4.5 star emblem, I mean. Yay for a 4.5 stars review from Manic Reviews for Man In The Middle. I'm so pleased. I love this two story collection. I was also happy to see this. And not so happy to see this. What happened there!? That is the person I want to climb in their lap and feed them cookies and say "It really is good...why don't you give it another try?"

But I'm not allowed to do that. A judge told me so...heh. Kidding. But this is one of those life lessons where I have to be happy with my good and let the bad have no power over me. Which if you know me, is super duper looper hard. But I try.

So thanks to Claudia at Manic Readers for stuff like this: "I loved Ms. Marsden’s writing style (I’m a big fan of the first person), and the way she displayed the character’s emotions, as well as describing in detail what they were exactly doing. You can never be too graphic in an erotic tale, and Ms. Marsden does a splendid job in depicting the confusion, struggle, love..." You made my week!

XOXO
Sommer

I'm stop #16, baby...

Thank you for visiting my stop on the 1RomanceEbooks.com one year anniversary blog tour! This is stop # 16. Your last stop should have been Michele Montgomery & Jeff Erno's blog #15.

Today I’m giving away a pdf of Lucky 13 which just recently got a groovy nod from Violet Blue. Both shocking and pleasant! Please leave a comment to enter the drawing to win! The more comments you leave on the tour, the better your chances of winning the grand prize—a Sony E-reader! But don't forget--you have to register to win. But there's still time, so go to 1RE and sign up if you haven't already done so. A Sony-reader could be yours. Imagine how much sexy literature you could store on that puppy!

The next stop on the anniversary tour is at Honoria Ravena's blog #17. Have fun and Happy first anniversary to 1RE. I can't believe I've been there for a year and I just have to say, what stupendous people. Many happy returns!

XOXO
Sommer

Smoking Hot...

is out. right. now! yay! Since it's so hot, we are off to the beach for the day. We are also leaving right. now.

I love this cover and here's the blurb doohickey. Please go admire my newest tale to tell if you get a chance :D

Van really wants to dislike her blind date, on principle of course. So naturally she really likes Sean Tierney on sight. Her thoughts automatically go from zero to naughty when they meet. He’s a tall, green-eyed blond who drives a smoking-hot classic car.

Speaking of smoking hot, the Halloween party he takes her to turns into a nightmare. Not because it’s a blind date, but because the whole thing goes to hell when a ghost in the shape of evil black smoke starts taking out the guests. Van decides she’d like to live to see another date with sinfully handsome Sean and she learns there’s something to be said for life-affirming sex. Lots and lots of life-affirming, we-may-die-here-so-lets-do-it-while-we-can sex.

Have a great day!

XOXO

Sommer

Even in German

It's a big day 'round here. Some of you long term readers will recognize the tradition of going to celebrate my grandmother's life today. She died nine years ago today and every year we go to the hospice where she passed and we remember her. We talk about what a character she was. How fiercely she loved, how big she laughed, how she'd um...hit you with her cane if she didn't think you were listening. X-D

Anyway, I'm off for the day. This song was sent to me by a friend and I figure you should hear some gorgeous music while I'm gone. I've only listened to it six...seven...twelve times.

Oh, and while I'm here. Seems I have learned German. I dreamt I was saying something in German and when I woke up I wrote it down phonetically for the man who is a WWII buff and speaks hunt and peck German. He emailed me back. I swore I could hear him laughing. "You just basically said, 'I'd love a lay'" (o_O)

God, I'm a slut. Even in German.

XOXO
Sommer

My Dirty Monday: Wet Synergy

I never can figure how long to make a review about lube. To me there are three options, the lube was good, the lube was bad, the lube was enh. The good folks at Wet sent me a nice hearty sample of the new Synergy which I stoically (heh) agreed to try for an opinion. Here is that opinion:

Regular plain old formula: love, love, love. Toy use or um...boy toy use. Either way, it's a go. It really did seem concentrated and to last way longer with less. Which is always nice because adding can often mean a) stopping (boo!) and b) glopping (also boo!). This formula was a little dab will definitely do you and then you are good to go. Unscented, straight shooting, non-irritating (for super Suzy sensitive like me, even) and non-staining. Nothing but good things to say.

Cool Tingly formula: I give it all the kudos above. I'm not normally a fan of the cool and tingly effect. That is a personal thing. I know plenty of women who will knock down their grandmother to get a bottle of cool tingly goodness. I will say I found the cool tingly aspect less aggressive and more pleasant in the Synergy than other lubes I've tried. Making it a much more enjoyable audition for the lube itself. Let's just say, if you like cool tingly naughty bits, this is the lube for you.

Beyond that, here are the stats:
~Water Based
~pH Balanced
~Hypoallergenic
~Latex Friendly
~Great For Massage
~Silky Smooth

Go visit their sites to see what lube will get you slipping and sliding. ;)

XOXO
Sommer

You could win a Sony E-Reader...no, really

The tour is already underway. Runs July 15-31. My stop is later this week but I wanted to give you heads up. Go register for your number and start commenting. One lucky winner will get a Sony E-Reader. Imagine how much smut you could store on that!

XOXO

Sommer

Oh you wait till Mom finds out, buddy! or My answers...

1. What language would you learn if you could learn any language in existence?
Cherokee. I am fiercely proud of my Native American blood (on both sides) but the Cherokee is confirmed 110%. My great-great-great grandmother was a full blooded Cherokee squaw. So...now I just need to find someone brave enough to torture themselves long enough to teach me. Good luck to me. (o_O)

2. One food you would perish before you'd give up.
French fries

3. A book you could read over and over again and never get bored.
The Stand by Stephen King (original version not the later releases 'uncut' version)

4. Your favorite flavor Jolly Rancher candy.
Cherry. My god. Do they even *put* other flavors in the bag?

5. A smell you would capture again but can't.
The original Aussie shampoo. Before they came out with about sixty versions. The original kind in the ugly tan bottle with the red writing and red kangaroo on it. That mixed with Polo mixed with Drakkar, mixed with Sebastian Freeze hairspray (ah, fruity chemicals and alcohol) is the heady, if not toxic, scent of my youth.

6. Your favorite 80's move and why.
The Lost Boys. Hands down. No argument. End of sentence. Because it kicked serious ass, that's why. (Followed closely by a tie between Pretty In Pink and The Sure Thing...and The Princess Bride (inconceivable!)...and Uncle Buck! Wait, and...)

7. Your dream getaway.
A log cabin in the middle of nowhere.

8. Milk chocolate, dark chocolate or no chocolate
Yes, chocolate! Preferably dipped in, coated with or stuffed with peanut butter.

9. A TV show that inexplicably makes you feel happy no matter what.
Monk. I aspire to be that okay in my not-quite-right-ness one day.

10. Are you Laverne or Shirley?
Do I even need to answer this? Really? I am Laverne. That was not even a fair question. heh.

11. Do you dance or stand on the side looking cool?
I stand on the side looking anxious until I've had a few drinks and then I dance like a maniac, usually spurred by something classic like "Shout". Oh, and it is a prerequisite to sing along at top volume so that you scare other event goers.

12. What is your most embarrassing inadvertent character trait?
I snort sometimes if I laugh too hard. And if I'm really nervous I do this weird laugh thing to punctuate each sentence. "Yes, I've been there--haha! It is very pretty there--haha! You would like it--HAHA!" (o_O)

13. Have you ever been truly, wholly, knee-knockingly, heart-stoppingly in love?
God, yes. And I hope it never ever ends.

Thank you so, so much to those of you who answered. It made my weekend. What fun, I now feel like I know secret little gems about people. And because I am nosy, this is bliss to me :)

If you've shown up late, no worries, give us your answers. I'll be continuing to post if they come in. <3

XOXO
Sommer

I'd like to get to know you well...

Remember the cartoons where the Tasmanian Devil spun so fast and hard he drove himself into the ground and got stuck? Yeah, that's me lately. And I chatter, chatter, chatter on my blogs and twitter and this and that to the point where I don't know what I'm chattering about. I think part of this is that I think people will up and forget me if I'm not on my blog pretty much every day. So I push myself. And then I get resentful. And then I have a nervous breakdown. And then I want to flip rude women the double bird whilst hanging out my car window weeping copiously and offering strangers fries with their imaginary meals (would like fries with that? see blog below).

I think part of it is people say, I love your style it's like you're talking to me. And I come every day to see what you've said. So when I have days I have nothing to truly say or a driving need to say it, I have that old guilt thing (where the fuck does guilt come from anyway and how can I get rid of it???). But the bottom line is: I truly do not like to be away from my blog. I love talking to other writers and readers and just people who randomly stumble over my blog and find something pertinent, sexy or funny to read.

So then it hits me in the shower (also known as my think tank) I can be silent with myself and peaceful with myself and nice to myself (my goal for this week) and still put up a blog. Because I want to know about YOU. I have put up some questions. It would rock my world if you would interact with me by telling me about you. I will leave this up for the next few days and pop in to post comments when they come through my gateway (sorry, I must say, recently I've had some doozy emails and comments so I finally had to put the permission to post thingy on).

Now these things, historically, either go smashingly well and we get to learn all kinds of cool stuff about other writers and readers and Random Mary from Kansas who tried to type in sweet girl.com and got smutgirl.com. Or...they fall flat and it sounds like a forest when a predator's on the loose. Nary a sound. Not even my favorite standby *crickets chirping*. Please help me to make this a success and fun. Please. Pretty please with fries on top and no double bird from the crazy woman.

I will post my own answers when everyone else is done in a few days.

Back to laying on my bed with the feet on the wall reading a good book. I am (re)learning the fine beautiful art of doing NOTHING sometimes but that which I feel like doing...

Tell me if you would be so kind...

1. What language would you learn if you could learn any language in existence?
2. One food you would perish before you'd give up.
3. A book you could read over and over again and never get bored.
4. Your favorite flavor Jolly Rancher candy.
5. A smell you would capture again but can't.
6. Your favorite 80's move and why.
7. Your dream getaway.
8. Milk chocolate, dark chocolate or no chocolate
9. A TV show that inexplicably makes you feel happy no matter what.
10. Are you Laverne or Shirley?
11. Do you dance or stand on the side looking cool?
12. What is your most embarrassing inadvertent character trait?
13. Have you ever been truly, wholly, knee-knockingly, heart-stoppingly in love?

TTFN

Today has sucked such copious amounts of ass I have two choices: 1) quit and work at a fast food joint or b) take a few days and step away from the computer.

This morning alone was enough for me to want to give my computer a long soapy shower with extra water. Just me, the computer, water and a bunch of sparks as I watched its spectacular demise.

I'll be back in a few when I don't feel like I could open a coke bottle with my teeth (or my ass). Too much, too much, too much. The final straw was checking in on the BSP and more waiting. I got acknowledgement and now I'm waiting. Waiting and hijacked email accounts and middle-finger-flipping-douche-holes = stress. I'm going to take a walk now. For like...twelve days.

See, I am practicing for my new career: "Would you like fries with that?"

I would! I fucking love fries!

XOXO
Sommer

Cold Hard Bitch...

I woke up to find that I couldn't get into the Yahoo! acct I've had forever. My hands were shaking by the time I finally realized it was actually compromised. Thank god, Yahoo! actually makes it easy for you if this happens. That was good. This all happened before coffee infusion, mind you. So I was so very not prepared on many levels. Got that all straightened out, but today is dentist day. I hate dentist day. I hate the dentist, though I love my actual dentist person. The dentist always causes pain no matter what because of the dreaded TMJ. So that was weighing heavy on my mind.

Got to dentist and he did his thing, said everything looked good and I needed to floss more (they always say that) and get to specialist for TMJ device (he always says that--because it's true *sigh*). So am feeling okay and pretty good b/c he was very gentle with me. But now must play beat the clock to get home to take girl child to her shift for volunteer work. So here I come and I need to go around the little exit thingy off the main road. And this woman is sitting there in her car and she is way back from the truck in front of her. If she'll scootch up like...8 inches, I can get through. So I gently (so very gently) tap my horn and make a move like "Hey, nice lady can you move up a bit?"

She totally fucking ignores me. And her body language might a well be a neon sign that says I AM IGNORING YOU. So I wait. Hey, I'm nice, not rabid and I have three minutes to spare. But then she moves up about...four inches. Not enough to let me through, but enough to give me hope. I try it. Nope. Can't do it. Though I can see from where I am trapped that I could trot a fat horse between her car and the truck in front of her.

So I gently (and I am not being funny, I VERY FUCKING GENTLY!) tap my horn. beep! beep! beep! Like "Hey nice lady, that's close but not enough. How about a few more inches."

She gives me the finger.

So I sit there, wrestling with my temper. My morning has been stressful thus far and I am a good person and I can certainly wait for this (SEEMINGLY NEVERENDING LIGHT FOR FUCKING CHRIST'S SAKE WHAT IS TAKING SO LONG!) light to change. I can.

So it changes. And I clap. More for myself than her. She leans over and gives me the finger again.

Okay, so here is where it took every shred of self control I could muster to just drive on. The guy behind me in a pick('em) up is laughing, shaking his head in sympathy for me. But seriously, it took everything I had not to give into the crushing urge to motor my window down, lean my entire upper body out of my SUV and flip her the old double bird and throw in a "Prostitution Whore!" a la The Housewives of New Jersey to drive the point home.

But I didn't.

But I wanted to. Still do.

XOXO
Sommer
p.s. then this song came on and I have decided to make it my anthem for today. tada!

FYI

If you get anything weird from me at the hot 4 sommer yahoo addy, ignore it, trash it, burn it. Appears my account was compromised. So that's an FYI. Now I need coffee. Like I needed to fucking deal with *that* before coffee! Grrr...

XOXO
Sommer

would it be wrong...

to feed another beach goer sand until he finally. shut. up? Yes? Damn.

Other than the motor mouth (overly friendly and annoying, motor mouth, mind you) we had a nice time. Everyone pooped out earlier than normal.

We were all stumped. There seemed to be less beach and the water was deeper and there were actual waves.Then it clicked. The first few times we trekked down was during a drought. We finally got rain over the weekend. Wow. What a difference a rain makes. Plenty of deep water to drown that man i--I mean to swim in. Totally. That is what I meant.

Swear.

XOXO
Sommer

p.s. the case is here. hot, hot, hot!

My Dirty Monday: Le reve vibe - white

Le reve vibe - white

This is a picture of my new best friend. The Le Reve vibe arrived at my home and was all white and hard and angled. It reminded me of the old-timey telephones. And by old-timey I mean the ones I had as a kid before everything turned cordless. When I picked the Le Reve up in my hand it fit perfectly. This vibe is smooth with clean lines and four speeds--Four. Not a billion. Who needs a billion speeds? Not me. I get vibes with a billion speeds and end up with one or two favorite speeds that I use all the time. Usually one. The point is, the Le Reve gives you Slow (makes you want to climb out of your skin but in a good way), Medium (oh, god we're getting there) and Fast (oh god, we're there!) and Sonic (I see Heaven). Me, I like slow. I'm weird.

Anyway, it doesn't have a bunch of bells and whistles. Clean lines, three speeds, nifty battery compartment because it's waterproof. Pretty box, surprisingly quiet so there's no need to announce you're getting off (unless you wanna). The Le Reve reminds me of a really smoking good piece of pie. You don't need all the garnishes and the chocolate shavings and whipped cream and the mint sprig, because the pie is damn near perfection when done right all by its simple self. And this simple, affordable, gorgeous in its plain-ness vibe is pretty much the perfect piece of pie. With orgasms.

XOXO
Sommer
**Sex toys provided by SexToy.com home of the biggest selection of vibrators online

It always makes me laugh when he says...

"Look, I'm having sex with or without you. It'll be much more fun with you..."

What can a girl say to that but yes? True story.

We've had birthday fun and dinner out and today a cleaning binge. It's been a busy, busy weekend and then that little thrilling sexcapade and well--I took a shower and am about to eat and then...I'm vegging on the big brown sofa. I am pretty damn snookered. But in a good way.

See you tomorrow. True Blood tonight! And Hung! Double good times.

XOXO
Sommer

taking a few...

It is girl child's birthday weekend! I have so much to do (her b/d always sneaks up on me as is in the middle of the summer anti-schedule and smack dab center of lazy season) and so much to clean. There is celebrating to be had in various forms. I can't believe that she is so...grown up. damn.

XOXO

Sommer

all better now...

I've had a few of you email me to say you were glad I'm all better now (RE blogs starting a few weeks ago). I wouldn't so much say I'm all better now as I'm dealing better. And I've stopped poking myself with a fork and letting the things that make me hurt take over.

I've got about 82 pages of BSP and am racing ahead on a paranormal. I have beach time, and walk time. I've cut back on wine and also shitty foot. Putting cleaner fuel in the machine and keeping a clearer head. But this song is on my internal soundtrack a lot. It helps me let out the loud feelings.

So let's see, it's not fluffy happy bunny time just yet, but it's not a rush of fear and hurt anymore. I had some things going on in my life that were beyond my control. That is almost a dirty phrase to me. But it's true. Some things I've had to just set behind me, some I'm still working through. The man has really good days and uber shitty ones.

Bottom line is: thank you for your emails. Thanks for your support. Thanks for your belief in me and thanks for giving a good goddamn. It means the world to me and I mean that! <3

XOXO
S

two quick things...

#1 Yay for awesomeness of a review for Alison's Wonderland out now and due to me...any moment. How about now?...now?...Now!? Soon! The reviewer gave my little story a nod.


The Three Billy Goats Gruff will have you looking at painters differently, a dominating Belle turns Beauty and the Beast on his (yes, his) ear, and let's say that at some brand-name theme parks with a certain mouse mascot, the shortest route may not always be straight...

and #2 To finally give a really cohesive answer to a question more than one reviewer/interviewer/reader has asked me, I'd like to introduce you to Alcide.

He is why I write wolves over vamps. Sweet holy mother of summertime heat. Woof!

XOXO

Sommer